Monday, December 14, 2009


"Heroes get remembered, but legends never die."

That statement sums up the short-lived, yet prolific career of Moshalicious.

Made up of a virtual all-star Salt Lake City line-up, the group was comprised of former and current members of Opened Up, Cherem, Aftermath of a Trainwreck, Sleeping Giant and Tamerlane. The goal of the band was simple: live up to the name.

And live up to the name they did. Taking inspiration from the band Bad Luck 13, the group got together one evening in the early fall of 2001 to write one epic song that would move crowds from front to back and side to side. They wanted all hell to break loose.

The only show the band ever played was at a small coffee shop called Undergroundz. It was a surprise set that everyone knew would come eventually. There had been too much talk and too many rumors swirling that everyone that regularly attended a hardcore show that summer knew it was bound to happen sooner or later.

The show carried along fine, until a drifter appeared in front of the coffee shop eager to tell tales and bask in the attention usually only reserved for sideshow freaks. The vagrant produced a dildo and bottle of toothpaste and proceeded to brush his teeth on the sidewalk for all to see. He then stormed inside and preformed a one man show that would later be referred to as "The Undercover Cop." Every eye was fixated as he waved his hands in the air and moved about the room and yelled for all to hear. When he was finished, he took a bow, yet no one clapped. The crowd was too stunned and unsure of what they had just witnessed.
But it was nothing compared to what they were about to see.

In the back of the coffee shop, Compilate had graciously (but foolishly) allowed the members of Moshalicious to borrow their equipment—because a sneak attack cannot be done properly if the band is forced to bring their own—and the stage was set.

The seven men, all donning masks and hooded sweatshirts launched into their first, last and only song, "Friends Don't Let Friends Fight Alone" and unleashed the fury.

Very few lyrics were actually audible as the three vocalists stormed the room, dancing with bats and dodged pieces of cinder block flying through the air. One bat became tangled in guitar chords and during a rather impressive spin-move, a vintage effects pedal was hurled through the audience, connecting with and breaking the thumb of the very man that had been kind enough to loan it out. As that happened, the guitarist became enraged and took to the dance floor himself, swinging the guitar above his head, daring anyone to get in the way.

As the majority of the crowd stood in stunned silence towards the end of the song, the vagrant burst into the room igniting a whole new level of energy. He too, joined the madness and began flinging bricks and  inflicting harm upon himself by smashing his own skull with a miniature bat.

When the song ended, not a single person clapped. The silence was deafening and no one was quite sure what had just happened, but they all knew they had witnessed something special.

Sadly, the only video footage of the show was destroyed and Moshalicious was never seen again, yet the legend lives on.


Samantha said...

i have the bat at my house-xbigdoggx

Megatron said...

holy fuck, that was amazing.
i was telling people about undercover cop a few weeks ago.

rumor had it that the next sneak attack performance that was to take place, but unfortunately never did, was going to involve padlocking the doors shut so nobody could run out, like they did the first time.


Byron said...

Who were those masked marvels?

xjoe jacksonx said...

"Undercover cop, guilty of treason. Undercover cop surrender yourself or you will die."

During the Moshalicious set I was smashed in the back of the head with a guitar.

The bum also did another poem with his fingers in his ears and about Police Brutality, anybody remember that?

Memories are golden

Hiker101 said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Hiker101 said...
This comment has been removed by the author.